Tasked with writing something purely as dialogue, I created the below texty stuff. Humorously, this story spawned while reading The Wind in the Willows. I don't think my brain functions properly. I did not spend much time on it, so please do not judge it too harshly.

"I cannot believe we made it."

"Have we? Are we really safe?"

"We made the train. This is as safe as it gets. Look, I have us right next to the TraiSec car. This is neutral ground. They would have to be desperate and crazy to hit us here. And I can only wish we had them scared enough to be desperate. We're safer here than we'll be back home, even. Look, sorry. Just use this time to relax. We have three days of safety until our next stage. Just appreciate that our present task is just to sit tight. We've done better than anyone expected, and survived the worst of it."

"Do you think he survived?"

"I ... Listen, Betts. He made the sacrifice. He decided you were worth saving. And you are. Your safety, your life is the mission. What you know..."

"I'm a mission?"

"No, no. I'm sorry. He made his choice, made it before the opportunity even arose. I have made the same choice."

"Why are you still here then? Why is he the one we left behind?"


"I'll give you the data your boss wants! Codes, formulas, maps. Download it all straight to your hem-jack! All of it! And you and your petty power struggles can go burn yourselves to the ground!"

"To answer your question, if he is alive, he is wishing he wasn't. Pray he did not survive. It is his best option."

"And how about my second question, why are you still here, hero?"

"Because the mission isn't complete."

"Back to being a mission."


"I'm going back."

"What do you think he would want you to do? Make his sacrifice pointless? He is a hero. You go back, you put yourself back in their hands, and you undo everything your hero did. Call me heartless, call me dead, I don't care. We stay on this train and take it home."

"You stay on this train. I was telling you the truth, I will give you all the data your boss wants. Go home. Take your reward. You deserve it."

"No. That is not the deal."

"Isn't it? I know you have contingency orders you are not telling me. Orders if I resist, if I am killed. My safety is not what you need. Only this here in my head. The more willingly the information is given the less corrupted. I know how this works. Your corporation is no better than the one you just rescued me from. You just hope by saving me you can get my assistance willingly. I am simply a temperamental commodity. But I will give you the data freely. Stick out your arm."


"I am going back."



"I am going with you. You don't have a chance alone. Actually we don't really have a chance together. But I am going with you. I will prove you wrong. We are not the same as them. I am not the same."

1 comment:

josh said...

i really like this! you are able to convey some of the setting (and even genre!), personal dynamics, and a definite conflict all without feeling like it is forced, with dialogue alone. and i am definitely wanting to know more of the story. bravo, i say. you should write some screenplays.