Netflix gives you the ability to attribute one of five different rankings to a movie.
1 star - hate it
2 star - don't like it
3 star - like it
4 star - really like it
5 star - love it
Now there is irony in the way this is ranked. As it seems one star still seems to be giving a movie credit. There should be a negative to the spectrum. Though what makes this worse is there is no zero. And by this I don't mean worse than hate. I mean a condition of utter, "meh"ness. I suppose technically "don't like" is a zero condition. As it is attributing a nothing to the rating. But "don't like" infers some amount of distaste. Thus perhaps the fault I am looking to throw lies at my inferring devices rather than the Netflickerates. It still does not resolve my positive ranking for a negative attribute, but people would be confused by that anyways. [sarcasm on] And I certainly can't stand leaving people confused [sarcasm off... sarcasm off... hmm, seems to be broken].
At first I thought being able to do half stars would help me feel like I properly ranked something. Then I realized that would in fact do the opposite. And I'd lose sleep over feeling I failed to give a movie its proper due in my completely subjective and entirely unimpactful ranking of a movie. And that actually isn't sarcasm [hmm did it turn off, or is it just waiting to strike when I least expect].
So okay, maybe I'm coming to grips with this whole five star thingie. Now to create my own conditions for what rank determines what. I'm seeing five stars as something that really needs to be earned. It stays in my head for the next couple days and gets more and more interesting and compelling as I think about it. I haven't put much thought into this, but I doubt I could fill a list of movies under this category, right now. I think this is the part of me that is looking for "the" best movie but of course can't find it. Another boundary to this post is it would probably require multiple viewings over time and that doesn't appear to be likely for most of these.
Four stars I have a feeling is going to get fairly populated due to the movies I have on my queue. This is due to my selection rather than there being a large amount of movies that satisfy my four star ranking. But this would have to be a movie that is a meritorious film, but just doesn't have that final kick (or stab) of a fiver. It doesn't have me pacing afterwards considering its greatness, etc. It should be noted that there could be four starrers that I would buy and watch repeatedly and fivers that I may never own and not even feel the inkling to watch again. Four starrers can border on fat dumb and happy movies but will need some kind of rock in the popcorn to break my teeth on. Though it could perhaps be a perfect blending of fatness, dumbness, and happiness, to make the rock a "what universal did this hit on to make me enjoy it so much?" piece of granite. If it doesn't stimulate this, I still reserve the right to give a four out of my being fat and dumb and just made happy.
Three stars is going to range between an I sat, I watched, and...I don't feel I wasted my time, to that was a fun spitless movie. Nothing that's lasting but also I was well entertained. A common cause of a three would likely be a good movie that gets derailed. It may be derailed right off the bat, but there's a greatness apparent if besmirched. Another three-ee could also have a side condition of, I know substance was there but I'm just not bright enough to figure it out and don't think I'd like it if I did understood. (This is actually a condition that can give a lot of merit to a movie for me. "I can feel its there but I don't have the eyes to see it." So that characteristic can land a movie higher as well, but it will take my enjoying my naivety and reveling in the brilliance behind the filter of my dumb.)
Two stars: bad movie. Or decent movie with a fatal flaw(s).
One star: bad movie and with a fatal flaw(s).
Disclaimer: All opinions are subject to the subjectivity of my illness and are not necessarily the views of my betters.
So like the good little conformist I am.
Brazil - four stars
Next up: Barton Fink (I love hardly knowing anything about a movie going in)
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